Wednesday, August 31, 2011

What makes a good surrogate?

The magic question that is asked all the time, but it is difficult to answer.  The reason that it is so challenging to answer is because the right answer is different for each intended parent.  What makes a good surrogate for A does not automatically make a good surrogate for B.  Obviously there are traits and characteristics that are important for each potential surrogate to possess, but the finer differences of each person are just as important to factor into the big picture.

So there are a few items that are automatically needed to be considered...
  1. You must be between 21 and 40 years old
  2. You must have given birth previously (no more then 3 previous C-sections)
  3. You must have no prior pregnancy complications or early deliveries (prior to 36 weeks, with the exception of multiples)
  4. You must not abuse alcohol or drugs, including certain prescription medications
  5. You must be a non-smoker and reside in a smoke free home
  6. You must not be on public assistance, including medical benefits
  7. You must have reliable transportation and childcare
  8. You must have access to all your previous medical records (including labor and delivery)
  9. You will have to undergo medical and psychological screening (if you are married, your spouse will need to undergo screening as well)
  10. You will have to pass a criminal background check
    Have medical health insurance that covers pregnancy and delivery costs and that does not have a surrogacy exclusion (you will have to provide a copy of your policy and exclusions)

      So outside of these requirements there are traits that I look for...a love of pregnancy, a sense of compassion, a maturity about life and a realistic outlook about surrogacy and the commitment it requires.  Any experienced surrogate will testify that surrogacy is a serious commitment of time and effort.  The commitment is not only required of the surrogate, but of her spouse and family.  The responsibility is not one to be taken lightly.  IPs invest so much in their surrogate, financially and emotionally.  I can not forget to mention that an open mind and a sense of humor are undoubtedly a necessity!


  1. Hi,

    I am a PhD Student in Paris, France and do a research on surrogate mothers. I was wondering if you might be interested to propose to participate in my study? it would imply me sending you through email several questionnaires (3) and a consent form. It would be anonymous. I already have met with several surros but the more the better for the research. Let me know if you'd would be interested in that. I can answer all your questions too.

    Take care !

    Ellen Lorenceau
    PhD student
    Université Paris Ouest

  2. I just read your post i think you are absolutely right. The points you mention in your post about what makes a good surrogate is right. I just love your blog, Thanks for sharing us your views.

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  3. Wow! i totally agreed with you all the thinks is necessary for being a surrogate mother. I am also in favor of surrogacy.
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  4. I just read your posts it is really helpful for those who want to become a surrogate mother. It is really a god gift that you can deliver a baby to someone who has really need it. Surrogacy has become so popular due largely to the increasing infertility rates combined with an increasing number of LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender) population around the world. You mention the points of what makes a good surrogate is awesome. Thanks
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